Pilgrimage
March was vibrant south of the Ohio
Luke’s lightsaber green grass and trees
solo in a rented Ford Fusion
at the exit to Lincoln’s birthplace
searching for a softer landing at thirty-three
the age when Jesus died.
A thunderstorm warning broke through Billy Ocean
out of my dreams and into my car
rains here regular at 4pm I’d learn
but with only cirrus above
nothing serious ahead
the worst was behind me.
Descending from the remnants of the Appalachians
across the county line catholic-baptist divide
statues of the Virgin ascended
liquor stores vaporized
leaving behind tobacco shops and humidity
in this part of the Confederacy that meant it.
The drive left too much time to think
exasperated by Top 40 radio
flora too repetitiously lush to notice
distractions disappeared into Two Lane Blacktop
concerns I’d kept at bay
aggressively assaulted my now captive attention.
What if this doesn’t pan out?
Am I failing my family?
Does my wife still care?
Self-doubt seeped in through the air vents
fogging the windshield periphery
sharpening focus on the task in front of me.
As I approached the destination
rehearsing interview responses
abstract thought formed concrete
a shuttered Fruit of the Loom factory
beneath a water tower’s flashing red light
warned those flying past to stay away.
I turned left ignoring the advice
parking in the shade of a warehouse
ready to give it another shot
starting over in a somewhat foreign land
if it provided what I’d been looking for
the means to believe again.
Matt Duffy is a teacher in the Pajaro Valley
March was vibrant south of the Ohio
Luke’s lightsaber green grass and trees
solo in a rented Ford Fusion
at the exit to Lincoln’s birthplace
searching for a softer landing at thirty-three
the age when Jesus died.
A thunderstorm warning broke through Billy Ocean
out of my dreams and into my car
rains here regular at 4pm I’d learn
but with only cirrus above
nothing serious ahead
the worst was behind me.
Descending from the remnants of the Appalachians
across the county line catholic-baptist divide
statues of the Virgin ascended
liquor stores vaporized
leaving behind tobacco shops and humidity
in this part of the Confederacy that meant it.
The drive left too much time to think
exasperated by Top 40 radio
flora too repetitiously lush to notice
distractions disappeared into Two Lane Blacktop
concerns I’d kept at bay
aggressively assaulted my now captive attention.
What if this doesn’t pan out?
Am I failing my family?
Does my wife still care?
Self-doubt seeped in through the air vents
fogging the windshield periphery
sharpening focus on the task in front of me.
As I approached the destination
rehearsing interview responses
abstract thought formed concrete
a shuttered Fruit of the Loom factory
beneath a water tower’s flashing red light
warned those flying past to stay away.
I turned left ignoring the advice
parking in the shade of a warehouse
ready to give it another shot
starting over in a somewhat foreign land
if it provided what I’d been looking for
the means to believe again.
Matt Duffy is a teacher in the Pajaro Valley
